Friday, February 20, 2009

We are E-VIL!!


You know some days its really is just much easier to be cruel. And I'm sure we are in the express lane to HELL, but it was just soooo damned funny that we couldn't resist. God, I love the elderly!

Ashlee and I have this client. Bless his soul, he's old. We think he might have mental problems which makes this even funnier and sadder at the same time. He was recently in an auto accident. While in the process of helping him, he mentioned that his ex-wife had just passed away and he was having to drive back and forth from Seattle to Olympia to comfort his girls and take care of the funeral arrangements. We felt sorry for him, talked to him about it a little and sent him a sympathy card.

Fast forward a few weeks later. He comes in to make a payment. We ask him how he's doing and mentions that his ex-wife had died a few days earlier and that his girls are really upset about it. Ashlee and I look at each other, thinking "weird, didn't he just tell us that?" So again, we sympathize and send him out a sympathy card and go on with our day.

Fast forward again a month this time. He calls me to ask me about how much he owes this month and I tell him. I ask him how he's doing and he proceeds to tell me that his ex-wife died earlier in the week and he has to drive to Olympia to take care of his girls. So I turn to Ashlee and am like WTF?? Just how many ex-wives does he have and why do they ALL live in Olympia and keep dying? Is it the water? Are we going to see him on the next episode of America's Most Wanted? The Black Widower. He seems so nice and poliete and quiet. Then again so did Ted Bundy. Its always the ones you least expect.

So Ashlee, the evil little minion that she is, comes up with a brilliant idea. We should send him another sympathy card. "yes, yes, yes" I scream and giggle with evil delight! (For those keeping count this is card #3.) "Sorry for your loss (of your mind!)" Evil laughter fills the office! Ahhh, we just couldn't help it. Its fun messing with old people. Especially old people with memory problems. Of course it has actually occured to us that he may really have 3 ex wives that he's killed and we could potentially be next, but it was so totally worth it!

4 comments:

SteveBargelt said...

Holy crap you CRACK ME THE HELL UP! You guys are so funny!

He probably just wants the mail... you know how old people wait for the mail!!!

Ashlee said...

Don't forget about him kissing our hands everytime he comes in and how he calls us "honey" and how he brings us candy. Wait a second... he is trying to marry one of us so we will turn into one of his "ex-wives" AAAAAHHHHHH

Irish Girl said...

*runs around office* *arms flalling in the air* AHHHHHHH!!!

Bird Shit said...

maybe for him, every day is like Groundhogs day and he really does think his ex died last week...either that or he's lost his damn mind LOL