Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Here's Mexi!!!

Ashlee won't have her ultrasound for another couple of weeks, but we are already pretty sure we know what sex the baby is and what it will look like. Introducing *drum roll* Mexi-Nugget!!!

For those of you not quite up on your ultrasound viewing skills, allow me to point out some of the features.

  • Note the "Angry Baby" eyebrows, carefully drawn on with black eyeliner. For that "what the eff you looking at Essa?"
  • Note the lips carefully outlined with this black eyeliner pencil while still keeping her lips there natural color. This gives Mexi that "come hither" look that every baby needs in the nursery.
  • NO those aren't floaties. Those are gold bangles that Mexi acquired on Ebay...yes while still in Ashlee's uterus. Every feisty Latina needs her gold bangles, it says "oh naa-ah, I don't need a Baby's Daddy. I can provide just fine for myself." (complete with neck swivel)
  • Last but not least, you'll notice that green thing around the crotchal region. No Mexi does not have the clap, the herp or the hiv. That is her diaper made out of the finest hemp she could find. (WHAT?!?! You try finding hemp on line while you're still in utero). Well where else to you expect her to put her rusty shank?

Of course Mexi isn't just a fashionista, she's also a linguista. Here are some things you might over hear her say:

  • Hola Bitches (when she first comes out)
  • Ey Papi. Smack dat ass (when the doctor spanks her for the first time)
  • Yo Brandon, change my shit (when she has a dirty diaper)
  • Yo quiero taco bell, Bitches
  • And a little for my homeys (as she nurses for the first time, and squirts a little on the floor)

Welcome Mexi. Can't wait to actually meet you!


Ashlee and Brandon said...

While I was reading this Mexi is havin a party in my ute cause you are already making her famous. All I have to say is thank you for embracing lil Mexi for who she is.

Bird Shit and Baby Caca said...

OMG! Mexi Baby needs to meet Stupid Baby! I'm convinced their soulmates!